erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
Your sister reminds me of me at her age. Stop her while you can.
Sprained my ankle at sky zone REST ICE COMPRESSION ELEVATION AND SHOTS it'll all feel better soon
Don't remember shit. It was only until I saw the glaze on my forearm that I knew you drove to get donuts last night. I also spent 20$ there apparently
So should I finish watching Space Jam and then get head? Or get head while secretly watching Space Jam?
Nah. And this is true. It's like you were trained by sexual Jedi or something.
*jedi wave* this is the penis you were looking for
My vagina feels like it's been kissed by angels.
My penis needs a shock collar
I've been wearing the same clothes for 3 days and they're covered in franzia
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
when you wake up naked in a bed with glowsticks, a rolled ankle, a hangover, and a condom; alone. you wonder shit
You know what would have been funny if we got arrested last night? The inventory search of the lock box:\n\nContents:\n1 work ID\n1 33 round Glock magazine\n1 set of keys\n1 vibrator\n2 bags fruit snacks\n1 parking hang tag
snapping my married booty call and next thing I know a plan b ad pops up
Randomize
