How can something that makes you feel so good one day make you feel so bad the next?
Alcohol?
Sex with a fat chick.
I am at a bar watching a rat tail get braided.
i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
guys i just found a dildo in the laundry room and its purple
whats a dildo? isnt that like a fancy piece of bread?
Someone told me that drinking would get me no where in life. Drinking has gotten me everywhere in life.
do herpes really smell.
Tonight when I'm getting a bj from a stripper I'm gonna imagine it's you bobbing down there
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
I'm going on a new diet. It's called the "eat healthy otherwise boys won't want to have sex with your fat ass" diet. Wish me luck.
I screamed so bad because I thought he was going for my sandwich forgetting it was in my hand
was I really that bad?
you army crawled across the kitchen floor, turned the cat into "super kitty" and crawled into the dog cage
Best feedback on my performance so far: "There are things that can't be unseen."
Did you send me a cake saying 'Happy 1st One-Night Stand Ever'?
You handed me an unpeeled grapefruit off the frat basement floor and then took a bite out of it.
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
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