Call me when you're up
Great dream, you were in it
you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
I think i found my new favorite workout. Go to a party where you dont know anybody and constantly walk around the house so you dont look awkward standing alone. im up to 1.8 miles
I just saw a girl make a shank with the underwire in her bra...
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
we made malted milkshakes. malt as in malt liqour.
i caught the condom in my mouth.. dont ask me how
Turned out the thing on the lampshade was a bloodstain, not a bedbug. We feel much safer now.
That makes the second boyfriend of hers that I've fucked. I'm gonna start keeping an eye on every guy she even speaks to. Girl is my sexual rabbit's foot.
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
My mouth is so dry that I'm about to put a straw in a jar of Vaseline and chug. This all addi diet definitely has its ups and downs.
I may or may not have definitely said the words "how do I put this beer in my purse without looking like an alcoholic" last night.
I was the oldest, shortest, and soberest at the New Years party last night. My life sucks
That time of your life is like a blur to me. There was churches, car fucking, and conservatives
Just convinced the cute guy from class that I have prostate cancer. GET ME OUT OF THIS TOWN!
Randomize