Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
ugh. my soul tastes like vodka
You kept screaming "Its taco night!" before every shot
at what point did you think saran wrap was a better alternative to shoes?
All I need right now is some mouthwash, dignity, and security camera footage...
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
I can't thank you enough for the well-timed blowjob. What a huge improvement in my outlook on the day.
I will have you know I turned Latino David Arquette down for sex because he's married. Total. Moral. Victory.
Flo's in town, ain't she.
Lemme put it this way babe, at point you were naked in Target.
Where were you?
Laughing
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
its 8 and I'm HUNGOVER!! how is that possible??
I hate when I'm sexting and I make a typo.
You just killed the sext mood.
Randomize
