the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
tequila makes me forget i have legs
No. I didn't know. I thought mid afternoon shots meant the day could only get better.
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
Their was just 7 people standing outside eating a costco chicken, definitley at the right party
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
If I take diet pills with my edibles I'll be a perfect person
Just ate a gummy bear I found in my sheets. So yeah, 2013 is SO gonna be my year.
He fucks like those drill things that you see when you think of texas
Just bought shock top, Trojans, double shots and baby oil. At 8 am. While the lady in front of me bitched about her expired coupons.
Multi-day drunkenness is to binge drinking as black diamonds are to skiing. They're tough and confusing and you hurt afterwards, but you did it and you probably got an alright story along the way.
My doctor said I can only have one drink at a time, ever, from now on. My life has officially started its decline.
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
Randomize