I don't think I can get bothered with getting laid tonight
I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
There's always time for handjobs
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
you were crying saying "if you love me you will find me a loaf of bread"
I just dropped $300 on lingerie. He better rip this off with his teeth.
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
Must've forgot to hang up with her when I was telling Josh I plan to pop champagne if I nail her tonight. She showed up with a bottle and said "only if we can toast it with Josh"
I am the only person I know ever to have been brought TO the bar in the back of a cop a car. Twice.
I ate the crust off the pizza and left the rest in the box. Even I would hate me.
Her son walked in on us and asked if he could "wrestle too."
You know it's a good night when the word slut is imprinted on your ass and your hands smell like lube.
I’d feel the same about religion. We can talk about it, but I want you to go down on me first
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
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