It's also dangerous to ride a bike down the stairs after a few beers, but I've done it.
Drinking franzia alone at noon watching a cheese themed episode of "The Chew" I'm ready to admit I need a job.
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
sooo trippy being back in town after 5 years. if you had asked me in high school who would be future coke heads, i would have been way off
yeah im watching him make his speech now. cant take him seriously tho. hes talking about funding for education and all i can think about is how ive seen what he looks like wearing womens underwear...
Your friends are scaring the cats so I'm going to smoke weed with them to call them down.
Costco cheesecake and whisky. A night made in heaven
No we were too stoned to stop you from wiping the peanut butter all over the car.
I'm sitting here with a band aid on my labia, this is a first
He put a doughnut around his dick and I ate it. What can I say. It was a good fucking night.
Watch out for the bush at the end of your steps. it comes out of nowhere
Live it up bro, they're always so surprised to find out you use magnums, being such a tiny man and all. It's a good thing.
I think my liver just tried to kill me, we need to slow down
He said they were his favorite shoes.. So I threw one down the sewer. Now he'll keep searching the house for the other one. Sweet silent revenge.
My husband found the cock ring I bought my FWB. I told him it was napkin holder and he believed me. And that’s why I need a side dick
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