Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
Last night Brynn convinced every person at the party wearing glasses that they stole hers, and she woke up with 8 pairs of prescription glasses in her bag.
Just pulled my keys, cell-phone and a pack of cigarettes out from between my cleavage. This one guy's face was priceless.
just had sex with a midget and didnt wrap it... were totally gonna have a tv show :)
I don't remember. I remember laying in the trunk of a car. For hours.
Did we fight the bathroom girl ? She just wanted to give us lotion and condoms.
You weren't just peeing. You were like grinding on it. And you tried to pee in the washing machine first.
Couldn't find any balloons, so we're doing whippets out of condoms. Being a ho has its benefits.
Yea we slept in ur room but im 80% sure we didnt have any peanut butter in there
I misunderstood what a furry was. Come pick me up.
i forgot to brush my teeth before I went over so i went to the bathroom and started eating his toothpaste. we're still in the early stages of fuckdom
All I can think about are the cheese it's on my desk at work this morning. Like are those apologetic cheese it's or does he seriously think he still has a shot..
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
Randomize
