Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
I'm a simple man, with a social life most psychopaths would cringe at
she's like "i'm so proud of u" ... and then i threw up on myself
Fun fact: tonight on intervention was the guy who did my tattoo
Sam from lord of the rings is 10 yards away from me, i am creaming myself.
I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys
Go to petsmart and tell me if the dog trainer is the guy I slept with friday. Thanks.
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
Want to go swimsuit shopping? First one who cries buys ice cream.
You know you had a good night when your wearing you best friends pants to work the next day
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
I might go bald with this hair pulling thing every night.
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
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