it was like the sexual equivalent of when Wilson fell off the raft and floated away
and then you made a playlist that was just "party in the usa" on repeat...
I did the seizure Bad Romance dance again last night, didn't I?
you were really good actually. your skill is increasing over time
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
When did you hit me on the head with a stool?
If she says "This is how acid feels" one more time I'm never trip-sitting them again.
If you do that, i will make all sorts of uncomfortable comments about my nipples being soft
I think I've just evolved into some kind of vodka fueled monster
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
I slipped on a piece of pizza last night and when the bouncer helped me up I told him the garbage can pushed me.
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
Im showing up stoned and in sweatpants. Because that is where im at in life right now. Sorry not sorry.
Parade of Dicks...that's what I'm calling 2017
My roommate just angrily told the cat he should have knocked, but that's not lockdown madness. They're always like that.
Randomize
