it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina.
im using old socks as coasters. im going to make a great housewife.
Googled "can you put dry ice in your drink?" I'm safee
I knew she could be a good mother by the way she craddled three 40oz's.
I'm also 95% sure I had a conversation with someone on how hard it would be to jerk off with out opposable thumbs
my bowl and the doses are under your mom's passenger seat
repeat: THERE IS LSD AND THC IN YOUR MOM'S CAR. HELP ME HELP US AVOID FELONIES
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
If you haven't seen a huge black man in tiny red snowflake shorts that barely cover his dick, then you don't know what I'm going through.
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
It was right before we played jenga with champagne glasses for a good half hour
Just realized I used a picture of my little sister to holler at a guy, only 3 months old and she's already my wingman.
His exact words were "Can I meet your vagina?" I kept wondering if he was going to try to shake hands with it...
Last night I had a sex dream about Trudeau, he hasn't even been prime minister for 24 hours
i refuse to take responsibility for eating Chuck E Cheese pizza and having any other repercussions than the shits.
So let me get this straight I was getting drunk with our science teacher from high school and you got drunk with an 82 year old woman who invited you back to her house and made you sandwiches.
Yes.
Randomize
