Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
threw up during christmas carols. the audience at the church seemed to immediately know i was a college student
Turns out I wasn't throwing up blood, I just threw up so hard it ripped my tonsils. Thank you Jameson.
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
I hope your pay increase has gone through because I might need bail. This is not what I dreamed adulthood would be like.
The best part about passing out on the floor was the fact that when I pissed myself, I didn't piss the bed again.
Even though he had a fractured vertebrae, the sex was still phenomenal. Better than normal actually. I hope the vertabrae never heals.
Only at Harvard can you walk in on a bunch of stoners and expect everyone to immediately stand up, shake your hand and introduce themselves like we're at a fucking job fair
He did a line of coke off my stomach then flipped me over and smacked my ass. Then, while he was talking dirty to me, he told me he wanted to hire someone to clean my room. And that's when he lost his boner. Life is so hard.
Business idea: assless chaps for toddlers. I'm high.
WELL I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS POSSIBLE TO COME SO HARD YOU HAVE AN ASTHMA ATTACK BUT HERE I AM
Do not ever look at a picture of an erect ostrich penis. You will regret it.
I better get weekly incoherent text messages or I will assume something is wrong.
why the hell did we go to a rave last night?
we didn't?
definitely went to a bar with strobe lights
JENNIFER. You passed out in a toilet with a color changing light in it.
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
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