Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
You smell like a Billy Joel song
i am already firmly committed to doing irish carbombs w/ 12 different people, and the st pattys day party doesnt start for another 24 hours. i may die
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
OMG HAIR ON HIS DICK. HAIR ON HIS DICK AS IN GROWING OUT OF HIS DICK. HAIR.
Everytime I know she spent a lot of time on her hair for one of our dates, I intentionally cum on the top of her head. That's how she knows I pay attention.
She was kind of put off because I kept calling her baby my spirit animal and staring hungrily at her breasts.
There's some drunk girl alone in the field, she looks like she could use some help.
Also it's only fair that you know that that girl is me.
i decided i'll just settle for a gay guy who can manage to fuck me like the straight guys do. but here i go again, talking about my dream man.
He asked me out while I'm back in town. I have to acknowledge and honor his persistence.
Your vagina must be laced with cocaine...
There is a 90 percent chance I threw up in a mailbox last night....
He fucked me so hard my nail polish actually chipped. I'm keeping him.
You weren't stupid you just made an ass of yourself. It's called a birthday party. That's code for night of regrets.
Don’t eat the Doritos. Jeff was eating them while he was watching porn
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