He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
Like reprimanding the wall for "sneaking up on me" drunk
On a scale of one to everyone dying I say let's aim for a 7
can't decide if i look like a hooker or a missing member of Poison today
He is the blood diamond of hook ups. You think you want it...but you don't
I tried to roll down the stairs in a ball. I have bruises, the pain is too much.
What the fuck, why would you ever do that?
Haven't you ever just wanted to be a ball?
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
I really want some funfetti cake but I feel like its more socially acceptable to go out and drink
And I threw up 26 times yesterday. I actually think I threw up a spider too.
apparently I got pissed off that no one would let me spray them with a bottle of champagne at midnight of the new year. so I sprayed myself with one shirtless in the near freezing cold outside
After a crazy night, morning sex is just trying to find a position where you can thrust without getting seasick.
He took my Spanx off and still fucked me twice. I call that success.
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
i don't know when underwear became an acceptable clothing choice for parties, but god help me i hope this isn't a passing trend.
1st date with cop went weird. He yelled at me & we had a horrible date. Walking to the car I tripped & started bleeding & then he made out with me. Is it wrong that I want to see him again?
THIS IS WHY YOU NEED THERAPY!
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