he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
His foreplay reminded me too much of breastfeeding.
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
On the plus side this hangover is the tipping point that finally convinced my lazy ass to get some sunglasses.
i honestly don't know why someone didn't cut me off after i broke the ceiling lamp with MY HEAD
yo your bro wants to know what time he got home and were you hosing him off
I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
I still have beer shits from last weekend. Dying from dysentary is a real threat at this point.
I was going down on her and she started whistling "Whistle while you work." I'm in love.
She dumped me and then asked if I wanted to come to her improv show. Fuck theatre majors, man.
He tried to buy me a drink at dollar beer night. All 3 of his credit cards were declined, so he asked me if I could cover it. Needless to say, I'm not calling him back.
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
Fine I’ll come with you but you better tell that guy to wear some longer shorts because the second I see a rogue nut I’m gone
Randomize
