I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
I was too high to figure out which of the three doors would lead me to my classroom, so i sat down in the middle of the hallway and ate a twinkie.
the majority of my texts from you are at 3 AM & consist of either "I'm drunk", "you're asian", or "bratwurst"
You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
Nope. Can't afford girlfriends. Still looking for the 25 year old bisexual tripled who owns a brewery or a casino.. the search continues....
Let's cut to the chase. What days are we sleeping together this week?
I cannot take someone's straight and gay virginity in one threesome. It's just too much responsibility.
I may or may not have traded your body to the rodeo's owner for free beer.
I could not handle jail. And my very angry parents.
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
Who brings nunchucks to a funeral?
you put your keys in the fridge so you wouldn't forget your yoohoo
I might need to come puke in your toliet on the way home
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
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