The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
This is random, but did i give u a handjob in the middle of the night or was that a dream?
Dude.. You paid a stripper $50 to listen to you cry last night.
Ok seriously I'm living off of bologna but I have 4 handles in the freezer.
Attention ladies coming to the party tonight! Tonight will be another chance to win the 5 bucks for getting my cousin hard. Bring your a-game, no one has been able to overcome the whiskey dick yet. Good luck.
you're asking me why i keep burn ointment in my purse.... do you really want to know the answer to that question?
I'm okay. We got a prayer rug sent to us with the face of jesus on it. From Tulsa Oklahoma. Kinda weird.
Well since your going through her phone..look man she loves you..she just loves my dick more
I will kick you in all of your body parts. All at once.
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
the people next to us at the red light cheered for you while you puked out the window...
Now: to brush my teeth, put on my grandma slippers and earplugs, masturbate to 50 Shades and then PTFO
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
Just because I also want a blowjob doesn't mean I don't want to just see you too.
Randomize
