HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
In a bar in glasgow talking to a 12 year old about life. Welcome to Kentucky.
porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
I just made a steamroller out of a christmas ornament. I feel so festive.
So my OCD kicked in and I cleaned his kitchen. His roommates were so grateful, they tried to pay me in weed.
YOU ACCEPTED, RIGHT?
Just bought a gingerbread house kit and pregnancy tests. Happy holidays.
When the hubs wants to wear his training mask during sex and pretend to be Bane you just go with it.
after what u told me last night I think we're past the wtf zone and at this point u should just join me in wondering if my barista lover is a gay porn star
I'm sorry I tried to spit drugs down your throat like a baby bird last night.
Emergency thong? Check! Suspension bondage is a go!
I walked in describing her boobs thinking I was talking to you only to hear dad say 'I remember when your moms were like that'. ALWAYS tell me when they get home early. Always
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
Are you coming over for scrambled eggs and hand jobs?
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