ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
Not only did I see you last night, you had me help you meet women by convincing them you were deaf and only I understood your sign language
So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
Bright side: maybe hell start being nice to you now that you know he has erectile dysfunction.
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
she's a nursing student, i didn't think vomit would freak her out so much
you puked ON HER
Well pulled into the driveway, and there she was. Kinda like a Vegas version of the mint on a pillow
We need to make boob twerking a thing. I feel like that's why vine was invented
He sent me a text from across the party that said "your sexy." I just couldn't.
The cops came, and I made friends with him. He wants me to babysit his kids.
He put his number in my phone as Steve handsome
this morning's inventory: a top hat, two empty bottles of everclear, half a slim jim, cigars, tiara, pot necklace, and some fishnets. and that's just my purse.
so I'm walking to my last final while opening my giant red bull and i look over to my right and the guy beside me had one too and was looking back at me. without missing a beat he pulls out a bottle of jager, pours half in mine, half in his and goes "cheers"....i'm not even mad i probably failed my final
Stopping for a booty call on the way to a lunch date... Bad form?
Randomize