Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
omg i met someone at the bar who sells hair feathers. that are long. saved in my phone as "haiirs deather"
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
I think I won over his best friend. He was staring at my boobs all night.
It's his sex noise. "I'm gonna cu-THE LORD IS MY SHEPARD AND I SHALL NOT WANT"
It's been so long that I've occasionally forgotten I own a vagina
Teenager with grandparents staying in their room: is to blue balls, as parent waiting for teen to come home safe: is to sleep. You will live- love mom
Dude, my ex girlfriend showed up, bought me a tequila shot, made out with me and then disappeared into the night. Then her current girlfriend saw, so she came over and slapped me and then I made out with her too
This was before halftime
I RUINED A LESBIAN RELATIONSHIP BEFORE HALFTIME
My mom just told me not to dance on any tables on Halloween...I'm choosing to take that statement as a joke
Too much dab too little lung dying šµšµšµ
My grandma just invited me to gate crash a funeral for the free food. Priorities.
Do you want to get naked and order pizza with me
I may or may not have spiked my gatorade to get through a game of monopoly with these children.
Dude my cat is eating sugar cookies with me. No joke. My cat likes cookies.
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