Whod you bang
**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
whoa...plan B gets you drunker quicker.
Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
The man at the Honda dealership told me I smell like vodka and probably shouldn't be driving.
We just found a handle of vodka in our fridge and no one knows how it got there. God I love spring break.
Did we both pass out talking about cake last night?
I know i'm the slutty cousin, but be honest. have you ever got your nose ring caught on a guy's zipper?
I'd just like to give a shout out to jesus and plan b for making this day possible.
Congratulations, you are no longer the only person who has watched me drunkenly pee on their furniture.
We ended up debating which Food Network host would do best in porn.
I wish I could remember her name, I mean we fucked and all, but it woulda been nice to tag her in the instagram pics.
You peed up the stairs in front of everyone then blamed it on the dog
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
Randomize
