Dude I wish you were here. I'm innthe back seat and it looks like outer space and everything feels like rice. idk. wtf.
i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
I just had to download an app to edit pictures on my new phone. The things I do for sexting...
You scratched my dick last night. It deserves an apology and I fell that actions speak louder than words when it comes to apologies like this.
There's jack Daniels coming out of my eyes instead of tears.
Dude, I just had the best sex of my life in a porta potty at the NCAA girls lax championships but didn't get her name or number. But I have her sunglasses. How is this possible, I'm sad.
I love your life.
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
She asked me to dress as captain planet for halloween and told me she was gonna suck the pollution out of my dick.
She got engaged last night. I don't think you should ask her out man.
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
Wish me luck. My vagina needs it.
May his noodley appendage touch you.
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
i woke up between my boyfriend and his sister and i don't know if we fucked or cried together
i black out too much to be "responsible"
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
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