I'm gonna start referring to my vag as my ladygarden
Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
My mom can no longer prohibit me from smoking pot..I sell to her boyfriend.
Mother nature decided I wasn't going to be a whore today. Fuck her.
I'm making tacos. Give me one good reason why we shouldn't be high while eating those tacos.
When the doctor said the anal leakage might not be reversible without some lifestyle changes you start asking if it's worth the entertainment value.
I've seen people win free drinks for a lot less dude, no need to drop trou on a piano.
He woke me up at 3 am, turned me on, then changed his mind. There is no way he is getting out of twilight now.
So do you want to hear how I got the hickey first, or how I got the black eye?
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
I know you're on a date and I should leave you alone but about twenty minutes ago I realized I haven't been spanked in years so if you're still looking for a birthday present, you know, consider it.
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
I LinkedIn messaged people about jobs when I was blacked out
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