I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
his status popped up and said 'probably going to jail.' it took everything i had not to press the like button
In case you were wondering, my scare crow is wearing your outfit from last night.
They're watching TV in bed. The Golden Girls to be exact. Aaaand I just heard them singing along with the theme song. I love living with gays.
The fact that he is from Canada is way more embarrassing than the fact that you met him on match.com
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
I told her that I was going up to my room to lay in front of a fan without pants on, watching Avengers and she still wanted to get with me. I have to marry her.
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
Just to let you know... If you ever want to get me a gift, the One Direction perfume comes out soon....... It's called Our Moment. It's an appropriate gift for a 25 year old woman.
Ive fucked up. im like a feral dog rabidly chasing an infrequent dream amidst a cataclysm of disaster
...and that is the first time I've ever wished fewer naked women on someone I like.
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
I really need to stop having sex.. I haven't been able to get a brush through the back of my hair for a good week and a half
this is the 3rd time this week I've gone to the liquor store to stock up for the next 2 weeks
It’s Sunday Funday! Stop watching football and bring your penis over here. There will be plenty of scoring!
Randomize
