He's Hawaiian. Thank god it wasnt a real American
Just think about how many life skills I lack. Cooking... Driving... Sobriety...
She wont be able to take it all. I'll use a shoe horn to get it in if I have to.
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
Also, there's the possibility of falling 5 feet to your death to make it more exciting
In which case I will yell FIVE SECOND RULE and continue to slam you
haha it's ok, I asked people. I was like "I'm high and lost" and the dude just said "That's my life. Love it."
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
we turned the lights off and all you could see were my glow in the dark stars and his penis
He told me that when he bends me over that chair I remind him of a bull rider. So thanks for being the ex that helps my present sex life
look, my penis is an amusement park, and it's closed for maintenance. why can't you just accept that?
The only thing that makes a night with half a bottle of cheap vodka is the other half of that bottle of cheap vodka.
I passed out in my bed, but woke up on the dog bed,with no pants, snuggling with toilet paper and a bottle of softsoap. Ive hit a new low.
I may have just got motorboated by a male stripper who told me I should be a porn star and not a vet student.
I am mildly hung over. Decided pants are very unnecessary right now.
Feel free to drag me back to reality at your convenience
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