Remember when you weren't going to be a shit show?
I found a fried uncrustable on the table from last night.
Warning: at some point today you will probably see several pics of me 69-ing a blow up turtle show up on facebook. Just disregard them.
How was me telling you it's my mom's birthday a go-ahead to bang my sister???
Everybody knows the last week of summer internships include showing up to the office hammered and hitting on the CEO
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
We legit stopped the the game so that Jamie and I could throw up in the bushes, and then continue to play intramurals... this is what my life is coming to1
You had me at "mimosas" several texts ago.
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
woke up to a family dragging me under their beach umbrella, they poured water on me bc they "thought I was dead" then fed me quesadillas and nursed me back to health... gotta love Cabo
I honestly feel really bad for any girl with a period that lasts more than a day
Everything about that text makes me want to throttle you and cry
There is an alarming amount of food in my bra.
I was going to learn how to knit but I got high instead.
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
You know you started drinking too early in the day when you have a hangover at midnight
thats called having FUN
Randomize
