do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
Would you let Jessica Biel poop in front of you to see her naked...but you have to wipe her too?
Dude. Zebras have bad attitudes.
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
I'm gonna take my bong and hot box the pirate ship in the daycare playground.
I hope you realize that its not me making that decision, but rather the combination of my genitals and sexual orientation
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
And please let him know I don't normally go off on long rants about feminist theory. That was totally the vodka talking.
I just took the kind of shit that makes your eyes well up with tears as you feel it moving inside of you... So cleansing.
As your only female friend, I feel the need to inform you that texts like these are why she dumped you.
AFTER I licked the bald guys head they told me we weren't playing
I'm to sober to make life ruining decisions and alcohol is to expensive at this bar for me to fear that level of drunk happening
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
You were drinking whiskey from a beer bottle i dont know what you really expected...
I saved him in my phone as "Well-Hung Burrito Savior." I love Taco Tuesday.
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
Randomize
