"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
You told me alcohol would be the death of you then ordered 10 shots of tequila.
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
I just discovered the Reese's pieces and sourdough bread sandwich. No signs of coming down.
Ryan learned the all important lesson tonight; Red Bull gives you wings, Jaeger gives you gravity.
We're at the urgent care down the street from you if you care to stop by
not saying it was a bad idea to throw an impromptu party but someone stole the microwave
My drug dealer is making me hot tea during the snowstorm...I'm a fan.
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
That moment when your fucking in an airport bathroom and forget to lock the door. That poor man...scarred forever...
We had sex on roll out bean bag chair, and then proceeded to sleep with a blanket with dolphins on it. Happy birthday to me.
HE TALKS ABOUT HIS DICK IN THIRD PERSON ABORT MISSION ABORT FUCKING MISSION
Do you think accidently including this month's Credit Card statement in my application will keep me from getting into grad school?
Depends ... when did you purchase your vibrator?
I drank a fishbowl of liquor and next thing I know I'm sliding into Zach Galifinakis' DMs
You make me want to do things that I'm pretty sure are illegal.
I dont pretend to understand how the heterosexual mind works. Its a mysterious cavern of stupidity and disgusting sexual acts.
Randomize
