I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
The Shake Weight not only toned my arms but significantly improved my hand job form and efficiency.
I still can't figure out why that's not in the commercial.
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
98% is good enough for me. Kinda like birth control. Worth the risk
You woke up, laughed, proceeded to throw up on me and then passed out again.
She tied her key to her bra the night before and couldn't get it off while trying to open the door this morning so she just took her bra off and let it tangle from the key while unlocking the door...the old Indian couple next door were shocked.
New reason to drink: alcohol makes soda taste like goddamn gold.
I'm treating this like a real date. My boobs aren't even out.
I'm so proud, I have tears
The bathroom smells like ribs. What did you do?
i hate going to her parties because i always know everyone there which means everyone knows my ex which means i wont get laid
Once again, your first date sounds like something of an epic. Odysseus' Quest for Fourth Base.
1) break up with him. 2) feel bad. 3) fuck some other guy. 4) feel better. Boom! Life plan. You're welcome.
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
Why is everyone giving me a hard time for drinking?!
Your in the library.
I’m going to bedazzle that dick
What does that even mean
No idea, but I guarantee he’ll get hard every time he remembers it
Randomize
