he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
If you get a breast reduction, you have to let me see them before hand at least once. It's a rule.
his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
searching "dave" under the university of pittsburgh on facebook was not exactly how i hoped to find my baby daddy
Did you Fuck minivan and her friend last night?
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
true... I just kept thinking "THAT IS A PENIS. OMG THAT IS A PENIS. DOES HE KNOW IM STARRING? STOP LOOKING. OMG THIS IS AWKWARD. PENISSSSS"
Don't worry, the house smells like waffles more than sex
he kept insisting he didn't have my number, so i called his phone and my number came up as "yeaaaaaaaaah!"
woke with Taco Bell next to me in bed and people's shoe sizes written on my arm.
FUUUCK. sunburned vagina. this is the worst day ever. i'm not leaving my room until it peels.
You tried to see how many socks you can stuff in yor mouth and I just put on a damp sock. Is this what bestfriends have come to these days???
You need to go! It’s a midwestern wedding - the single girls out there think life ends at 25 if they don’t have a picket fence and family. That’s when your penis introduces himself
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
Randomize
