I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
bahahaha. this guy working at subway literally has someone's name tattooed on his arm, crossed out, and another name below it.
I don't understand how he can't hear himself snoring, but he'll wake up to me sneaking m&m's from my junk food stash beside the bed...
How do you tell if you're on the terrorist watch list?
i had the all of mcdonalds chanting USA as he motorboated you
She fell down the stairs and hit her head on the concrete. Then she stood up, flashed us and stumbled away. I forgot to get her number..
I said "have a good day officer and I'll see you friday when I get arrested for being too drunk.."
It's official, the cities waste management does not recycle porn.
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
Not only have I fallen off the wagon, it ran me over and just kept going...
blew off easter dinner with the fam to go play shot roulette. woke up in nothing but my boxers in the back of a random pickup truck.
That's the kind of activity you can only get away with by wearing a lion codpiece
I had the choice between 9 burritos and 1 girl...
And...?
ARE YOU DEAD? TEXT Y FOR YES OR N FOR NO.
im gonna miss him. and by him, i mean his dick
Randomize
