i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
I just wanna be some guy's midlife crisis
Why am I getting the stink eye from these people? They're acting like BYOB isn't kosher in a laundromat.
Knitting and drinking wine. Forget my 21st birthday, might as well just skip to my 60th
I always know the weekend is over when the real license comes out and the fake goes back into the hiding spot.
When the cops come you probably shouldn't be poking cars with a stick.
Im embracing the luau theme and maybe bringing a kiddie pool filled with alcohol. Im also embracing the high probability I will not remember this night.
Im drinking in homer but I guess Egan got arrestest on an "assault by water ballon" charge but tom actually threw the water balloon in question at the bartender.
in line at jewel. the cashier is puking in a garbage can while ringing up customers. glad to know im not the only one that 2012 is kicking in the face already.
Just had a threesome with a hot Turkish guy and an even hotter French lawyer. This what happens when I travel alone. You have only yourself to blame for this.
We are buying drugs from a guy with a Jesus fish on his dodge caravan.
Never let him bartend when he's tripping. He sprinkled a ton of mexican shredded cheese over a jack and coke and called in a Monterey Jack Daniels.
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
You've changed since you got that strap on
hey if my parents say thanks for the meatballs just go with it ill explain later
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