our school mascot just walked into class and threw condoms everywhere. welcome to college
I actually had no interest in him until he started talking about his 4 arrests. That made him go from a 5 1/2 to a 8, easily.
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
every time fb tells me a dude i fucked is now friends with another dude ive fucked, i die a little inside. thats way more honesty than im comfortable with.
me and my mom are sitting in the bank parking lot drying my beer soaked check with the heat... the whole car smells like heinekin and I'm trying to convince her I don't need a.a.
don't judge, it's breakfast wine Wednesday.
You are literally throwing a tangerine right now. Beer pong is not played this way
Is it 3pm? Or am I losing my mind because it's pickled in vodka and diet coke?
You asked her to play "the coma game" with you while hooking up, and then passed out in her bed. She couldn't wake you up so she slept on the floor.
Looks like I won that one
I would fuck him In a heartbeat, an obese child running up stairs with an irregular heartbeat, heartbeat.
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
Dad danced with a girl half his age and her boyfriend just sat at the bar and waited for dad to be done. I bought pity nachos.
Kind of like the new iOS 10 because I can send sexts with fireworks or confetti. Really gets the point across
I'd like to buy a season pass to your dick please.
Randomize
