her vagine was all disorganized.
I kept telling myself all night that it was completely okay for me to lose all sense of my morals because it was my birthday.
he also begged me to fake an orgasm when he couldn't get me to come.
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
The only thing that was weird was that it WASN'T weird when she got out of the shower and saw me blowing him.
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
I walked in, the bartender looked at me, grabbed 3 shot glasses and a pounder. Lined them up on the bar then made a line with salt on the other side of them and said I wasn't allowed to cross it.
I made a wizard staff out of Keystone light... I am therefore the smoothest wizard in all of our university's history.
I didn't know what to do so I panicked and puked in my pillowcase with my pillow still inside.
Not many people can say they've been photo bombed by an antelope. I sure did.
Simultaneously sexting while making brunch plans. Multitasking at its gayest.
It's 1am and I'm on LSD and I have diarrhea in a Dunkin Donuts. Help me
really who shits their pants then locks themselves out of their apartment? ... I threw my underwear out in a random bathroom
Apparently walking into a national conference and proclaiming "i'm here to fuck shit up" is frowned upon.
Who knew?
Have you ever been anal in a bush on the Vegas strip drunk?
Randomize
