but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
ok what kind of idiot turns down casual afternoon sex?
In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
so whats your words to drink to for the state of the union? mine are 'change' 'fight' and 'you know'.
mine is 'the'.
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
To put it in a frame of reference with which you're familiar, it was like making out with a golden retriever.
I feel like I was just dunked in a tub of beer and then thrown in a giant dryer with rocks in it.
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
If I was gonna be at your campus for halloween weekend, I'd dress up as the masked horny fairy and give out condoms. I'm so thoughtful.
I'M CUDDLING WITH MY CAT AND THAT GUY SENT ME A DICK PIC. UNANNOUNCED DICK PICS ARE TERRIFYING AND MY CAT WILL NEVER BE THE SAME
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
If she didn't have scissors in her hand I would have motor boated the fuck out of her when she was done cutting my hair.
Randomize
