no, i will not be your spotter when you masturbate with a noose around your neck
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
I had a pretty decent weekend -- aside from dropping the baby on her head. That.. That I feel bad about.
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
I froze in his sixty one degree room but i came so hard. Like fucking the eskimo god.
My patience ran out after you started clapping at the strippers everytime they took off a piece of clothing.
I think I sprained my soul last night
110% paid for our cab with a lap dance
You've never even broken a bone. You singlehandedly disprove natural selection
I am compiling a playlist that reminds me of all my best sexual encounters. It shall be called THE MUSIC OF MY VAGINA'S PEOPLE
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
I thought my dog was a polar bear. I kept asking how the north pole was this time of year.
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
There was a trampoline and tequila. It was glorious.
I don't know how guys can take themselves seriously when they see themselves naked
Randomize
