Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
Why do I feel like I'm not the only one drinking to make my night class teacher look better?
he's like a stage 5 clinger and he won't even fuck me. he has to be gay. my personality isn't really THAT great.
I will give you all my nachos to make this happen
Watching her eat just hurts me
theres 2 cans of open Campbell's soup on the counter and a note that says "guess which one is puke" ... want lunch?
He made me brush his hair afterwards because it made him feel like a ken Barbie.
God I hope the sex was good.
As a general rule of thumb, I don't call until the claw marks have healed.
fuck off. It's 10am and I'm drink gin and ginger ale through a twizzler straw. My life is marvellous
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
Dilemma. I'm out of wine and I can't put on clothes to go to the liquor store bc I just got spray tanned. If this isnt white girl problems I don't know what is.
I saw a drunk guy run across the street with an American flag between his buttcheeks.
I'm getting paid to get fucked up. How much better could this get?
Randomize
