thanks for being my friend even though im irresponsible with my vagina
I know the vomits not mine cause its on my back.
Just found my car keys in your throw-up.
you did pass out in the elevator last night, so it could be motion sickness
i had to write a bad check to buy franzia last weekend. i have my priorities in line.
we agreed that it was acceptable to get the cat high as long as we gave her a lot of food.
He had a ladies night special at his place. Unlimited jello shots till 10, 50 cents after.
Its a good night to get drunk in my onesie.
I'm doing homework tonight but if you end up going out drinking I would like one courtesy peer pressure text.
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
Also, yes, I look pretty rough. But my ovaries fought back this morning so getting dressed decently was not a priority.
Oh my god did you actually lose a tooth
In all honesty the person most likely to secretly slip me drugs would be ... Me
can you please not set my house on fire for once???
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
Randomize
