My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
i knew she was high when she broke up the cookies into her glass of milk and ate it like cereal
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
Awesome morning. I just met my boyfriend's wife, should I have shaken her hand or was the hug a tad over the top?
No its cool, because I bought a handle of tequila earlier, in case things went south
Have you ever wondered what your stripper song would be?
Not sure if jager bombs can cure tuberculosis, but its a theory im testing as we speak
Just to be safe, you should be prepared to jump out of a second story window
I guess I'm in a committed relationship. We just had shot 1 of 3 of Gardasil. I'm now dead inside.
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
Just for the record, I did not have sex in your bed. Happy 4th of July.
So I've already made 5 bad decisions today, wyd?
I miss your drunken presence, and strong odor of hard liquor and potent weed.
and then she asked if she could shave my junk
and howd that go?
can you pick me up from the hospital?
He sided with his father, so I slashed his tires. I’d say that’s a fair trade.
Randomize
