how do flat chested girls get laid?
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
Remember my theory about how the universe perfectly unfolds to fuck me? Well, it's at work right now
im suggesting it to him. and by suggesting i mean we're not having sex again unless im wearing high heels
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
Bro... You handed me an ice cube from your drink and said "tell me if it tastes like pickles".
We are finally out of the honeymoon stage of the relationship because it turns out that you can't come back from peeing on me in your sleep.
I felt like... 50% confused and 50% like a slow roasted flip flop.
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
Hey this is your roommate. You know the one that let you have sex with her while you called out your exs name and cried?
I have no recollection of that. You must have the wrong number. P.s. your thongs still on the ceiling fan.
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
Randomize
