I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
Dude, I found another chunk missing out of my tooth. Fuck drinking on tuesdays.
Only if you bring Listerine. I can't come home to my husband from a bachelorette party with spermbreath again.
6 margaritas later and free shots of tequila, i woke up with a fat lip and they said i blew my nose in a slice of bread
I started singing the national anthem on a train in London. Happy 4th of July assholes
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
Oh no, we smoked the revival weed. It came in a Batman bag. It hit like justice. And orphans.
Weekend plan is a big bag of dope, delivery food, Bollywood marathon and masterbating my dick raw.
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
I'm in my bed. Snow angles in fresh sheets. don't even try to get me out tonight.
Good morning! So would you prefer me to show up kind of late or on time but looking like I got chewed up and spat out by an episode of Buffy the Vampire Slayer?
I'm eating cheesecake with my hands completely naked while falling asleep
I'm not dropping acid and watching game of thrones with you. That just sounds like a disaster waiting to happen.
And to be fair, I think we all suspect that forbidden sex with an outlaw biker might be worth it.
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