You know, if there were no such thing as marriage, i don't think porn would exist.
laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
nothing says 'im willing to leave my comfort zone for you' like letting you choke me during sex
She said she was jealous that i could wear headbands, then growled at the ground in shame..
when your 30 and im 37 and we're lonely and single, lets make a pact to murder each other.
I told him to pick up the beer can he threw in front of the police station. So he gets out chugs whatever's left and throws it back and says ok let's go.
If I was gonna be at your campus for halloween weekend, I'd dress up as the masked horny fairy and give out condoms. I'm so thoughtful.
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
She may be more beautiful than I am, but I bet she hasnt pissed in as many public places as me...
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
I can never have sex in Utah again. The altitude had me breathing like a fat kid going up stairs.
The CEO is on this whole 'what do you do with your spare time?' kick. Umm... get drunk and have sex in bar parking lots.
You kept flirting with some guy while I was throwing up on the sidewalk, and I screamed YOU DON'T LIKE MEN
So who has the penis shaped party tray? You or your mom?
Randomize
