I put my bosses number in my phone as "Do not call," I shouldve known my drunk curiosity would overcome any desire I had to keep my job.
again?
Dude. Muppets take manhattan on netflix instant. Pass my midterm or relive my childhood? Tough decision.
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
Please tell me you are a size medium in men's clown onesies and that you forgot them here last night.....
You know when the three of us hug it out in the alcohol isle in walmart it's gonna be fun.
Dude. Zebras have bad attitudes.
My drunken abilities have only improved since college....I can navigate the streets of chicago like no ones business, do push-ups to hail a taxi and instantly become an mma fighter after 3 shots of hennessy
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
Btw if you ever get emails that pretty much contain 'bwahhhhh jatkkvsweuo' it's safe to assume it's me.
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
You were throwing cups at people in the basement, yelling at them to get out of your swamp.
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
ALSO I MAYBE ACCIDENTALLY HAND CUFFED MYSELF TO A CHAIR
I’m not lawful evil! I do evil things because I want to, not because of the law
Randomize
