well most of my day revolves around power hour
Is it weird that I found myself thinking of that blue chick from Avatar while she gave me head after the movie?
I can't cum and do my makeup at the same time.
Also, I had a dream I had a ray gun and woke up holding my dick.
Bring the cards this coming weekend. If I'm not here I died skydiving Friday
Yes, i finally made it. but let me tell you...i can smell myself right now in class right now, this scent is called alcoholism.
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
What? My family got wasted on patron and I threw up on my pants and said it was gravy. Hot mess.
We just broke into a lion king sing along. Understanding is not possible.
That accounts for only three of the penises
Found a phone out last night at the bar. EPIC homemade porn vids on it!
Sounds like she has 4 first names. Like a sad version of Ricky bobby
I also fell asleep on the side of a tree so like I hit my lowest point there but it was a good time
Not as bad as when you were sitting in the pond getting fed water
Ya’ll! My debit card got switched with my boss’ at lunch today (both Red Wells Fargo)....I realized it at whole foods AFTER I ran it for $100 at Vanity Room getting my vaj waxed 🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️. Most awkward IOU ever tomorrow.
Decisions were made. The quality of them will be judged tomorrow
Randomize