the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
the best job he will get is a sex ed teacher in alabama
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
Just because you were able to pour the entire bottle of wine into 2 glasses does not mean you took it easy last night.
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
You high fived me for banging your sister but lock me outta house bc I ate your pumpkin pie? Priorities bro
There was a note in my hello kitty underwear telling me "don't go over 9000"
currently waiting for her to check in on Facebook, the second she does I'm there. someone is getting laid tonight
I'm not stalking, she is pretty much begging me to come find her if she checks in
I have a surprise for you guys
What is it?
A MOTHER FUCKING SURPRISE DON'T ASK QUESTIONS
Was I at least a good cuddler? Like at least honorable mention?
As pissed as she was, you would've thought I was trying to get back into his pants instead of his booze collection.
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
Oh. My. God. It is NOT okay to drink Johnny Walker when there is no Jameson. My skull is eating my brain.
Well that's very sweet of you. I have a strange feeling you're going to regret this when you sober up.
NO REGRETS FUCK DA POLICE
Randomize
