I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
So gin and wine won't be happening again
just dropped my bong into 7 pieces, and carried the glass shards around my house. dad saw the blood dripping down my arms, and asked if i slit my wrists. way too high to laugh at this.
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
i just opened the overnight bag i packed at 2am last night. Apparently all i thought id need was a handful of quarters, mascara and one sock
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
I just took a shower and found half a cookie melted under my boob. Please tell me there's a reason
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.
You're the only one to love me enough for me to admit the following: Rock-bottom sounds like sobbing to a Miley Cyrus song.
i feel like spreading the word of drunken joy.
I think my fortune cookie is telling me I give good blowjobs.
She's high and screaming MEREDITH IS A WHORE
I just passed a lady driving with a cat in a sweater sitting on her lap with its paws on the steering wheel
Only you....
Randomize