new number. flushed my phone last night when i puked, made B help me look for it for 2 hours.
do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
I'm sorry..where i come from learning how to exploit a wealthy middle aged man is a right of passage
not exactly restoring sanity, but he is throwing up on the national mall right now
I dont think he was a real cab driver. I think he was just a creepy guy with a van.
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
I took the pregnancy test for shits and giggles, but neither shits nor giggles were had.
Crying while listening to Miley Cyrus. BE GLAD YOU JUMPED THIS SINKING SHIP!
Can we relax the "married man" rule just once?
I made a White Russian but saw how early it was and decided to substitute it for milk in my lucky charms. This is what it means to be an adult.
I asked him to get me another beer, and he started making muffins.
we didn't have sex though. because i have the will power of an ox.
I've been on the cocaine and semen diet for the last 24 hours, lunch sounds great.
Randomize