she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
Eating hibachi. The chef is squirting sake into my mouth with a ketchup bottle. Happened twice, more to come.
I think his parents are learning english from the phrases I shout during sex.
He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
Despite what happened tonight, Im still expecting Jesus birthday sex
Wow way to turn my death into an oppurtunity to get laid
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.
I just did a Kegel and my back popped. My vagina is a gift to penises everywhere.
I think we should have realized the night was going to be nuts when it started with a bum dying in front of my house.
Please tell me you woke up next to the hot one cause his ugly friend is still snoring in my bed and my favorite panties are ripped.
Wingwoman of the year. I'll buy you dinner tonight and a new thong. It was THAT good.
I'm sitting here with a heating pad and a fan on me eating snow caps off of my boobs
It was a frighteningly large penis to say the least
No we didn't talk. I was high and doing naked yoga in the living room when she walked in so it was just awkward. I didn't even know my dad had a girlfriend.
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