So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
I faked an abortion last night.
Fuck. sleeping in my sisters room again I heard zombie noises outside my window
eating toast while peeing. You think this what kanye meant by the good life?
I drove to my yoga class while eating a piece of bacon. Wow. I see myself in a whole new light.
That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
Passing out is my livers way of protecting my mind.
If by "Are you high?" u mean "Did you just pass out at Genghis Grill walking to your table and falceplant?" the answer is yes.
I woke up in a lawn chair by the lake to some man revving his boat motor at me.
Pulled a muscle in my back masturbating. But still listed as probable.
I think I just did my first walk of shame. He sent me home with a watermelon from his farm. Southern one night stands.
He finished and he wasn't even totally hard. He actually came without a boner.
HOW IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE.
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
Randomize
