Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
He cooked the food on a paper plate in the oven.
The chick I went home with last night had a happy trail
You put a nerf gun to his head and demanded him to take you to taco bell..
as I was walking out the door her and her roommate started singing "toot it and boot it".. I'm in love
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
Dude. Stop sending me lines from Hungry Like the Wolf
I sat on my couch last night watching What Women Want, eating ice cream, and sobbing "why doesn't she like me?" Why was I born a man?
If blow jobs were a super power she'd be in the Justice League.
Hey you're my best friend, I'm sorry I picked my vagina over my heart last night.
That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only
Dude, they hit that lizard part of my brain that tells me to fuck people.
Preach sister.
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
I would totally suck a dick for some poutine right now
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