Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
just chased whiskey with a pickle. i definitely recommend it
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
So I told her I dislocated my shoulder and she said "well okay. I can either be on top or blow you."
Decisions, decisions.
She started to rub her ass on my shoulder and i instantly thought "i am going to get E. Coli"
He snuck into my grandmothers house, broke her lamp, fucked me, then had breakfast with us the next morning. I am an awful granddaughter.
I snorted a few ambien and woke up here. A lady banged on our door, waking us up, demanding our towels.
they adjusted my tv to black and white ... i thought i drank myself to colorblindness
This was the first time I've ever pushed myself until I vomited. Sorry, random couple laying on a dock at 8:30am. I would have picked a better spot so you didn't have to watch/listen to me vomit, but you guys were being MAD quiet. I had no idea you were there.
I wanna come do a blessing for your apartment. And by that I mean I want to drink a lot of whiskey and watch ancient aliens in your apartment
If you sleep with him again I'll have you spayed
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
And our sex soundtracks thus far have been metal and Star Wars
I did put on a shirt to start the night, right?
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