And we started making out. She asked me to pick a number between 1 and 10. I said 6. She took me to her room. A few minutes later I wasnt a virgin. DUDE I WAS GOING TO SAY 2.
i'm almost done photoshopping my face on his wife. it's a done deal
she passed on me to fuck the foreign guy. is there a manlier, slightly less gay way of saying "always the bridesmaid, never the bride"?
nope.
I wasn't expecting a boner of this magnitude
Is it obsessive that I keep picking my crazy sex rug burn scab so it leaves a scar I can remember him by?
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
I just farted in the bathroom and the guy in the stall next to me started gagging. Its a beauitful day
it was like a shit fog rolling out of the east to encompass me and have it's way with me
So worth it. Come over for bacon egg cheese vusquit later. 12. I slept with Jimmy? On my period? And told him he had mother issues? No tequila. Tequila bad.
Halloween: the only night of the year wheee the more high I get, the more it compliments my makeup and outfit.
Dude you literally tried to cook your phone in the microwave. You were so wasted you asked your mom to help you turn it on.
Ugh I don't want to adult today. I need like a dozen more coffees. Or cookies. They're interchangeable.
Like he was trying to be sexy but he had shit taste in porn so i left
Randomize