i love how you can even make your typing come across bitchy
my sister just canceled her nose job because she thought it would hurt too much
It'll hurt less than being alone
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
It's when I'm in my pajamas and in need of a gin delivery that I miss NYC most of all.
I don't know how but I have our hotel room door handle in my purse... this can not be good
Im covered in vodka and melted gummys. Fuck summer.
The dumpster is full of naked people swimming. I'm going to join.
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
I got high with the cantor. Rethinking this whole non-practicing Jew thing.
A little, yeah. We were stealing firewood from the neighbors (drunk), and figured it would be 10 times harder to be angry with us if we got caught if we were naked, and 100% more hilarious.
I'm watching porn in spanish. Thats studying right?
Is it tacky to frame a negative pregnancy test?
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
Well, fuck this election. I'm getting drunk, regardless of who wins.
Randomize
