This kristen chick is fuckin nuts. She's pyscho. She's a trainwreck. She carries baggage. She's... Perfect.
I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
I'm at the grocery store, it's 10 am and the woman in front of me just bought 3 boxes of wine. She turned around and told me not to be afraid
She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
I will always make you feel special and slightly offended. That's my job.
New York City is dangerous when the only bars you go to are the ones that have 'open' in front
I just rode a horse than walked onto my property in boarshorts, flip flops, and holding a 40. What do I win?
Regardless of your intentions, deep throating a Twinkie is NOT sexy. You owe that poor cashier an apology the next time you pump gas.
Brett got me a cake with a pic of me shitting
How ya feelin sunshine?
Like a million dollars! ... That has been hit by a bus, drowned under water and beat repeatedly by a shovel.
You are talking to me during sexting hours. Be careful, innuendos are taken seriously
I'm gonna invite every single tinder date I've had to my birthday. Let them fight, battle Royale style. The winner gets to fuck me. \n\nBest. Birthday. Ever
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
Randomize
