is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
He stole her cigarettes and walked 15 miles just so he wouldn't have to wake up next to her. God I love being a lesbian.
I'm questioning the dried chocolate syrup on my tits.
He went into the alley to piss and came back a minute later with a case of Bud Select. I'm speechless.
You weren't just peeing. You were like grinding on it. And you tried to pee in the washing machine first.
Need help. Super baked. Stuck on couch. Dying of thirst. Bring paint thinner or something to pry me off. Only thumbs and neck work.
I get off at the next exit which doesn't have a shoulder, a guy is riding my ass so I cant stop. I think I got as much puke on his car as on mine.
I'm driving while wearing hulk hands
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
okay the fridge is completely filled only with alcohol. Not even exaggerating. There is no food.
Sometimes I wonder if we're going to make it to 40.
I think my fortune cookie is telling me I give good blowjobs.
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
We were dancing and then he pointed to the club floor and there was money that I dropped everywhere. That was the nicest thing someone has ever done for me.
But I think I successfully seduced her with my alias.
Randomize
